Illustrating in Wonderland: This is my life :)

illustrating for  finattanlinala.com

Wildfire in Wonderland: Finattan Lina'la

People like to say that if you love making art so much you will overcome the financial difficulties and all the other obstacles that make it hard for you to create, like wandering attention, day jobs, and life in general,  It's true.  Artists will find a way to create.  But artists need to be resourceful and know how to hustle.  I'm finally learning that.

 I'm working on a solo project, Finattan Lina'la, which for my purposes translates to Illustrated Life.  I've been wanting to grow my illustration skills for a while and I decided that a great way to start would be to explore life on Guam, through illustration.  In order to insure my commitment to this exploration and growth I thought an exhibition of my journey would be a great incentive.  Art supplies are not cheap!  And if you live on an island, in the middle of the beautiful Pacific, art supplies are really not cheap.  I guess that's a paradise tax. In June, of last year, I applied for a grant from the Guam Council on the Arts and Humanities Agency. And last October I found out that I got my grant and could move forward with the project, with the greatly appreciated funding.

The actual application was fairly easy to put together.  What was hard was convincing myself that I deserved a shot at some funding.  I kept thinking about the amazing artists I know and thinking so and so could really use this.  I felt like I would be taking something from other local artists, who I felt deserved it more than me.  I believed in my project and it's purpose, I just didn't believe in myself.  I moved forward with the application at the urging of my mother, who is so amazingly supportive.

The grant application required three letters of recommendation.  I sent out some emails to people who have been supportive and inspiring, to me and other members of my community.  I can't express how touched I was by the letters I got back.  Those letters, from people I admire so much, were just what I needed to turn in my application with a smile on my face and optimism overflowing in my soul.  As artists, we create because we have to.  We could cease existing if we bottle up that energy.  We do it silently with out an audience, if we must. But when your art reaches someone and that dialogue from artist to viewer, or listener, or reader, begins and you find out that your creation is acknowledged and appreciated it's the breeze that turns a small flame in to a wild fire.  Un dångkolo' na saina ma'åse to Dessa, Nella, Carmen, Mr. Tenorio, and of course, the Maga'håga of my heart, mom.  A very special saina ma'åse to Cara, for pointing me in the direction of illustration and being a great hustle role model.

So now I'm inviting my friends in Wonderland to visit my project.  The website is a work in progress, as are the illustrations, and the rest of my life.  I will be updating the blog and illustration pages on the site regularly.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy creating it.  I can't wait to invite everyone to the physical exhibition later this year.

Click here to visit Finattan Lina'la!

And since I love all of you for following my blog, despite my neglect, I want to share the rough sketches for one of my next illustrations.

Community in Wonderland: The planetarium

The University of Guam may be closing the planetarium.   :(

Life in Wonderland: Sketchbook 03

Last night was a Kannai Third Friday art night.  I got home really late and I'm still pretty tired.  I'll be posting pictures of the event in the next couple of days.

Life in Wonderland: Another water color and ink

Rubbelkrepp & Frisket

Day off in Wonderland: ink and watercolors

Viewed in Wonderland: 5VFYT 02

Another 5 videos from You Tube.

1. from Guam
I didn't get to go to the fair this year, but I found this on You Tube.

2. educational
Team Tesla!  :D

3. funny


4. artsy


5. the Wild Card!
 

Celebrate in Wonderland: Belly blessings

A couple days ago I was double blessed.  I did two belly blessings in one day.  

 I did the belly blessing when Amanda was pregnant with her second child, two years ago.  So when I got a message asking if I'd be willing to bless her belly again I was very excited.  And it was another great experience.  We talked about art and pregnancy during the blessing and we had some yummy quiche at Nuts and Grains.

Amanda's butterfly and shroom blessing

Later that night I did a belly blessing for Rachel.  Rachel is an amazing woman, mommy, and baker.  Her boyfriend, Andres, is one of Allan's good friends and Rachel and I spent the evening sharing Allan and Andres stories.  It takes a lot of patience and a sense of humor to date these guys, so it was nice talking to someone who gets it.  She also brought over some amazing desserts!  :P

Rachel's turtle and hearts blessing

I can not wait to meet these nenis!!!  

Life in Wonderland: Sketchbook 02

Life in Wonderland: sketchbook 01

I have something big coming up.  I'm not ready to say much about it, but I can tell you that it's a solo project.  In order to get ready for the project I'm going to try to post a sketchbook page at least every other day.  
Hopefully I can do this, at least until I'm ready to say more about the project.  ;)

Viewed in Wonderland: New feature :)

Okay so I decided that in order to consistently update my blog, I need to develop some sort of schedule.  So I'm going to be creating features for certain days.  Today is the first one.  Every other Wednesday I will be posting 5 videos from You Tube.  (Allan and I are You Tube addicts.)  So I'll be posting one video from or about Guam, one educational video, one funny video, one artsy video, and one wild card random video.

1. from Guam



2. educational


DFTBA!  :D

3. funny


I think this is hilarious.

4. artsy



5. the wild card!

I love the Doctor!

Life in Wonderland: middle class?

My mom recently posted, on Facebook, that Mitt Romney said households making $250,000 are middle class.  As expected a discussion followed and of course Romney's wealthy background was brought up.  There was mention of how these rich businessmen provide jobs and without them there would be no work.  I wouldn't have said anything, but there was also talk about how Romney's education and opportunities were provided by his father and the response was that his dad was being responsible.  That's understandable, but I also think that if you're a parent who is struggling to ensure your child has opportunities, that might make you feel like you're failing as a parent, if you aren't "responsible" enough to provide them with higher education and great connections.

This was on my mom's wall.  My mom is the director of a non profit that helps person's with disabilities.  My parents never had a ton of money.  They've struggled.  My brother and I are struggling.  This is not because we are not hard workers.  My father, mother, and brother are some of the hardest workers I know.  I'm not just talking about actual employment.  They are people who are always willing to help others.  I see how it breaks my parents' hearts to watch others struggle and I know it breaks their hearts a hundred times more to know that my brother and I are struggling.  I never ever want her to feel like they've failed though.  Seeing that discussion on my mom's Facebook wall compelled me to tell her that.

This message is for all those struggling parents who are working so hard to give their children all that every child deserves.

Mom, I’d just like to take this opportunity to make sure that you know, if I don’t make to the middle class, it was not because you were not financially responsible. The path you chose may not have given me the boost needed to join the upper middle class, or even the middle middle class, but you’ve given me much more than that. Some parents employ minimum wage workers to give their children the world. You work to give everyone you meet the world. I’m the daughter of a woman who works so hard to help empower people, to help people go from just surviving to really living. I hope you know that is what keeps me reaching for my stars. You haven’t raised wealthy children, but you’ve raised considerate, compassionate children who’ve become loving adults with strong work ethic. There are so many parents out there who work really hard for their communities. Teachers, social workers, fire fighters, and others who provide neccessary services and are underpaid and underrepresented. I don't hate the rich, but I'd like more support for these people and small business owners who do more than provide minimum wage jobs.

Note:  I might be a little sensitive at the moment.  My awesome boss of five years is having to shut down his small business.  He's doing his very best to make sure we transition in to other employment opportunities, but it's still a bit unnerving not knowing for sure where your rent money will be coming from next month.  My financial stability is slightly affecting my emotional stability.

Life in Wonderland: another remix

I painted this a while ago.  I posted it on Deviant Art in 2006, so I know it was either painted in that year or quite possibly earlier.

This piece is titled Passion.  I was young and full of combustible energy when I painted this.  I remember thinking that in good and bad times we should live life dancing in the fire.

I still feel that way.  Looking back at this painting and thinking about the girl, who enjoyed every stroke that created those flames, makes me a bit sad.  My life is fuller in ways it wasn't then, but it's also a lot more predictable and so much slower.

I'm not sure if I'm dancing anymore.  I haven't stopped moving, but it's more of a swaying now.  The girl who went in to that fire has changed.  The fire taught her about love, struggle, history, life.  It's still teaching her about all that and more and she's still enduring and dreaming of the future.

The fire may not be as bright, but now she's brighter.