life (132) community (99) guahan (70) crafting (57) gallery (50) viewed (45) Celebrate (43) album (41) shopping (24) cast (16) oishi (12) hooping (5) growing (4)

Friday, March 27, 2009

Survival in Wonderland: Living vs. Surviving

I had an epiphany last night.  I am motivated to survive.  My boyfriend is motivated to live.  There are certain things I realize I need to survive.  I need to be able to pay my bills and eat.  I've also become mommy to a beautiful kitty and puppy.  I need to be able to feed them, too.  I work a full time job in order to do all of that.  But it's hard on me because that's pretty much all I'm able to do with what I make.

One of the reasons I love Allan is also a reason I loathe him.  He is motivated to live.  He wants to be able to party, skate, create and play music.  He is funny and charismatic.  In some ways he is the anti-me.  In some ways we balance each other.  But sometimes we just drive each other insane.  Sometimes I want to live, but realize survival is more important and sometimes I don't think he understands that.


  1. Wow..I am in the exact same situation with my boyfriend, and we do end up balancing eachother in the grand scheme of things. I really identified with your words. I wish I could be more of free spirit, I'd love to have little posessions and pick up and just go and live, but I also have cats, bills, etc that I need to be responsible for.

  2. i can understand this entry :)
    you've got to find the middle ground in your lives
    perhaps telling your boyfriend that it's important to 'survive', he might realise & help you out

    i'm the saver in my relationship & my partner is the spender, but we balance each other out nicely

  3. I've been there. The best way to work it out is to find a balance. Sometimes you work hard and he parties and sometimes he works hard and you party. It's only fair.

    Everyone's gotta live a little ;)

  4. SO TRUE! But you know I think it's ironic and even hysterical to spend money even when you don't have it. Everyone deserves a LITTLE treat once in a while! Or just go play in sprinklers in the park with him. Instant fun and its free! :)

  5. Forgive me if I don't agree with you and your commenters view of this situation. I believe that you are living your wild side through your boyfriend. Of course you wish you could do the things he does but you sacrfice so he can do those things. Have you ever seen parents who have children that they push into playing spirts or cheerleading only for the reason that they themselves couldn't do it when they were young? I say tell him to commit to the relationship or get out. People who want to party all the time usually don't end up being in any meaningful relationships. Jusy My Opinion!

  6. Thank you all for your comments. They are all very much appreciated!

  7. I came here from BlogCatalog, and I absolutely LOVE your blog! Everything, including the music, which I usually hate. Amazing stuff, I'm so glad I found you!!


Thanks for taking the time to view my blog! Comments and questions are welcome. :P